a school room in my craft room
photos of the boys on the wall
Pardon the poor quality and the size, I haven't bothered to do nice photos, these are off of my phone. And if you don't remember what the original place looked like, you can check it out here and here.
So, we were really hopeful that this mortgage modification would come through. On July 12, 2013 however, I received a sheriff's sale notice in the mail. I was so mixed with emotion, on one hand I was HUGELY relieved to feel like God shut the door on our hope of modification, but on the other hand I was really devastated. I began feeling shame and embarrassment. I have always been very proud of owning a home and now it was being ripped from me. But the relief that I felt actually out-weighed the pain of the letter. So I called the mortgage company to find out why it was so sudden and the lady I spoke with told me to look at the foreclosure and the modification as two different rail road tracks. One was going at one speed and the other at another speed. She also told me that the modification deliberation would be hurried along a little faster (30 - 45 days for a decision still) now because we have a sale date. So Andrew and I started looking for and looking at places to move to. I got boxes from a nice family off of craigslist.com and began packing everything that we didn't need for the next few weeks in faith that we would be moving August 1st.
We found a place that both of us fell in love with, filled out the application and put a down-payment down and were accepted. We hadn't been planning on moving, renting, putting money down anywhere and were just catching up on some bills so needless to say, we were strapped and Andrew was watching the bank account like a hawk. Well, some issues came up with money transferring between accounts and a whole fiasco that took him an entire day to sort out and our down payment check came back returned even though we had the money to cover it. I was again devastated, thinking, "they are going to think, 'why should we accept them when the very first and smallest check doesn't even go through?'"
I was feeling hopeless and sick with worry and fear and disappointment, thinking through all the possible things I/we could do to come up with enough money to make it through until the next paycheck and what to do if we don't get this place that we wanted so badly. I cried and pleaded with Jesus for hope and forgiveness for my doubt, worry and anxiety all the way to drop off a check and on the way home I was just calling out to Him again for assurance and peace and He spoke to me and said, "I WILL give you hope and a future." And then I saw a rainbow. I just broke down in relief and tears and laughed out loud and pointed to the rainbow and told Bennett, "see the rainbow, it means that Jesus will always keep His promises." What a sweet, sweet time it was on the road.
I am still feeling a little frightened and I am still having a difficult time not worrying, but I have been reminded that He can work miracles and He is in total control.
We haven't heard anything back from them about the check yet, so we rest in His hands that He has us covered and He knows best. We just keep hoping and trusting that something will work out. That HE will work it out for us. So thanks for reading, I hope that whatever your circumstances are right now that this will bless you and help you find His joy, peace and hope in the midst of LIFE.
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Kayla
***{update: andrew got a hold of them and let them know what was going on and all they said was, "thanks for letting us know, just write a new one and drop it in the rent box." HALLELUJAH!!!!! what a relief! Praise Jesus with me!!!!!}
